You may go into Kerak... but you will die there

There's something quite sobering about excruciating pain. It puts things into perspective. At the moment I have one upper right wisdom tooth forging its way into the world like a mother giving birth to twins at the same time, much to the detriment of my entire jaw line, sinus passages, inner ear and throat. Yes, nothing like a rogue demonic molar to bring some clarity.

I was ordered to rest up, but I found myself quite restless and got busy in the kitchen instead. I began at 06:30 this morning and I ended up making two pizzas, fish curry, rice, a greek salad, fruit salad and cajun chicken:

I even made our favourite vegetable juice. It's not actually a beverage of choice, it's more like medication for those of us with gluten allergies but it works wonders for just about everyone. It contains beetroot, baby spinach, celery, parsley, apples, carrots and ginger and is also surprisingly sweet:

An entire morning, three loads of washing up and several hours of contemplation later, I came to the following conclusions:

1. Bisexual men freak me out. That's about the only thing that really scares the shit out of me. Not bisexual females, not gays or lesbians, not transgenders or cross dressers, not transsexuals or transvestites... just bisexual men.

2. Rhinos are kinda like fat Unicorns. If they all went on a diet and got makeovers, maybe we'd be one step closer to Utopia.

3. Happiness, like the concept of Time, does not exist. I know no one wants to hear that, but it's the truth or my truth at least. As I've said before, the concept of Time only exists on earth because only here is time discernible through motion and change. It's mankind's tool to measure abstract intangible constructs, to group and label periods and events and to store them in nice little boxes so that everyone can comprehend and understand them because the rationalisation of time is only important to humans.

But in reality, we live day in and day out and essentially, it means nothing. If world leaders decided to rebrand 2012 and call it the year 3012, they could do so and it wouldn't mean a damn thing or make any difference whatsoever.

Happiness doesn't exist either - but for different reasons. And here I have to elaborate on the definition of Happiness, or what Happiness has come to mean to most people. We live in a world where everyone has come to define, perceive and understand Happiness as being in a perpetual state of joy or ecstasy - a permanent high. So essentially, if you're not bouncing off the walls like a Teletubby on crack, then you're not Happy.

Everything in life has become about instant gratification...  the I-want-it-and-I-want-it-right-now(s). Personally I blame emails, the world was a far better place when people had to wait for weeks to get their mail. These days, two minutes is deemed too long to wait for a response on an email.

For others, Happiness is a bottle of coke and some chocolate, at least that's what Coca-Cola and Cadbury want you to believe.  

The reality is that what happiness really is, is contentment. A sense of peace in a world of chaos. No internal or external conflict... no mental, physical or emotional anguish... no struggle with life and reality. Just a calm, serene presence in want of nothing and grateful for everything. But there's no one like that, I'll hear someone say. Well, I beg to differ.

*Title taken from a line in the movie Kingdom of Heaven. It's has absolutely nothing to do with anything. It was just stuck in my head like a broken record.