DAD: (after graduation ceremony, reading the agenda) What's this "Cum Laude"?
ME: It means "With Honours", she graduated with honours
DAD: Oh is that it!? I thought that they were saying "Clap Louder" and I just saw everyone clapping louder, so I clapped louder too...
Mother: You girls are so boring…why don’t you go out somewhere…meet new people!
Teenage us: Ok, Fatima is having a get together at her place, can we go?
Uncle: (to 4 year old Zaynub) Come inside the house, it's Magrieb and its getting dark
Zaynub: No Daddy, I want to play outside
Uncle: Come inside please?
Zaynub: No Boss
Uncle: Get in the house NOW!!
Uncle: Ok Zaynub, go...go and play outside please
Uncle: PLEASE go and play outside
Uncle: Please, just go and play outside, NOW!
Zaynub: NO, I want to stay inside!
MJ: my toes are smelly today - i think its these leather sandals
ME: pfft. lol. so many anonymous haters.
I dont know what some of these Hater cunts want from us MJ
think about it
they spend their time reading our shit
wishing they were like us
they are jealous of our big dicks
ME: LOL maybe... true...But I dont have a big dick :P
MJ: its ok - im sure it'l still grow
Mother:(after one of my embarrassing ordeals) Is there no rock bottom to your seemingly endless bouts of humiliation?
Me: Apparently Not.